5. Ford Pinto
This vehicle had it all: whitewall tires that stained brown at the drop of a dime, a bland reddish-orange stock paint, and a spinoff station wagon model that was as long as a bus.

But people usually didn't notice these little setbacks after spotting the Pinto's most glaring flaw: mass amounts of rust spreading across the vehicle like the plague. That and the exploding gas tank.

One final note: Ford's decision to cut the back window in the shape of a massive trapezoid didn't exactly capture the essence of sexy car design. Maybe a rhombus would have been more stylish.

4. Renault Fuego
The Renault Fuego isn't the ugliest car ever to hit the U.S., but it's close. The tires were grossly undersized, the shiny exhaust pipe stuck out like a sore thumb, the black stripe across the body was gaudy and distracting, and the huge back window made the vehicle look like a space pod. Even on the showroom floor this car looked outdated by at least 10 years.

The most laughable thing about the Fuego is that it ran worse than it looked. I'll spare you all the technical mumbo jumbo, but so much went wrong with this vehicle that the mechanic's manual could have been thicker than a phone book--enough said.

The only thing saving this vehicle from being the ugliest in history is its plainness. The color schemes (guacamole green and black, off white and black) were absolute nightmares, but bland enough to keep it from earning the top spot.

3. Subaru Baja
It's a car--no wait, it's a truck, I think? Nevermind, it's just ugly. The Subaru Baja looks like a cross between the back end of an '82 Chevy Pickup and the front half of a cheap pair of Velcro sneakers.

The first thing you notice about the Baja, if your eyes can stand the shock, is its blindingly-bright, incredibly-tacky yellow and gray color scheme. Like a truck, it has an extended bed, but unfortunately it's too short to be of any real use. And if the stock Baja isn't lame enough, Subaru offers a mini camper shell that makes it look like a hybrid between a yellow hearse and a 70's station wagon. Cool, huh? It's marketed as a sporty off-road type vehicle, but by the looks of the undersized tires, you'd be better off going 4-wheeling in a Honda Civic.

The silver lining: it has all-wheel drive, so you won't run it off the road when you're rushing to the dealership to buy something decent.

2. AMC Gremlin
I know what you're thinking: what happened to the back half of that Gremlin? Looks like someone took a huge axe and chopped the back off. Or maybe it got rear-ended by a semi-truck--at a very strange angle.

It was one of the tiniest little deathtraps of its time, with the engine taking up nearly half the vehicle's total area. If you were taller than 4'6'', you could forget about fitting into the back seat. The optional gold and purple color scheme, which was probably stylish to a select few 35 years ago, wasn't enough to save this vehicle from complete aesthetic disaster.

This first subcompact model of this little beauty was introduced on April Fool's Day, 1970. How fitting.

On a positive note, you could slap at least two dozen bumper stickers on its gigantic wrap-around rear bumper.

1. AMC Pacer Hatchback

Some said it looked like a fishbowl. Others thought it resembled a pregnant roller skate. Nicer folks affectionately referred to it as a "human terrarium." Whatever the opinion, the AMC Pacer is the ugliest, most disgusting vehicle ever to hit the roadways.

The biggest problems? A tiny hatchback shouldn't be surrounded by six massive windows. No side door should cover nearly half the side of the vehicle. And a car seat should never be woven from the same fabric as a pair of blue jeans. The one saving grace for hatchback Pacer owners was that the station wagon model looked even worse. It was longer, had larger back windows, and introduced the fake wood paneling that brought to life the notoriously-putrid yellow and brown color scheme.

With this little monstrosity leading the AMC fleet, it's no wonder they couldn't sell enough vehicles to stay in business.

Honorable mentions:

The Smart Car

My viewpoint: If it can't hold a week's worth of groceries, it isn't a car. I absolutely love the idea of living 'green' and maximizing fuel efficiency, but driving a vehicle that looks like a golf cart with doors just isn't my bag. It's a sad period in time when a Dirt Devil with wheels becomes a status icon. Parallel parking would be a breeze, though.

Would you believe some police departments in Europe are using these as squad cars?

Fiat Multipla

This car is a toss up. I'm not sure what it resembles more: a bizarre insect with a large body, tiny eyes, and a drooping head, or Duckman? With four huge doors, an unbelievably massive front window and a drooping engine bay, this is by far the strangest car I've ever seen.

Staring directly into the Multipla is like looking at an optical illusion: it's too abnormal to be hideous--or is it?